Elul Week 2 – The next 7 names toward return

Hello there,

I hope that second week of Elul have been meaningful in all the ways you’ve hoped for. My kiddo and I came down with COVID, so you’re getting this weekly email in loosy-goosy late fashion while I am slowly recovering.

This daily practice that my friend Leia and I have been exploring continues to really supportive for me, both in thinking about my reflections and in creating a framework for these reflections to be part of my yearly cycle of Jewish practice.

Reminder of the process: Each day, I awaken to find which name of G-d Leia (who is 14 hours ahead of me) chose to reflect on next, marvel at the resulting collage art (which I’ll let Leia share if they wish), then I intuit some questions for myself about my relationship to that name and how I embody that name, I spend time with those questions, and then I create a prayer to that name that I try to carry with me through the day.

[Here are the Week 1 names if you need them.]

Here are the next 7 names we’ve explored so far, and what grew from that exploration with a reminder that it’s still in a first draft form. Feel free to engage with these questions and prayer for personal use – journaling or pondering, or to create a personal practice that better suits your journey.

List of names for this week, details below, with mountain image in the background

Yedid Nefesh — יְדִיד נֶפֶש – Soulmate / Soul Friend

  • Do I enter my relationship with the divine, with myself, with others, with hope and openness for a deep and lasting connection?
    • Am I a friend who, in safe and reciprocal relationships, relies on others and is reliable as well?
    • Have I cultivated and tended relationships in which I feel able to be seen at a soul level, where I feel known deeply even if the way I present myself to the world changes?
    • I ask Yedid Nefesh to hold me like a lifelong friend, modeling a love I can then embody, one that welcomes being held and seen, and also holds me responsible for the holding and seeing of others.

Avinu / Imeinu — אָבִינוּ/ אימינו – Our Father/Mother/Parent

  • Have I grappled with the difference between simply being older and earning the title of elder? Do I carry this nuance into how and when I defer to someone older or challenge and grow forward from their stopping point?
  • Do I reach for wisdom with humility, knowing that the true elders in my life offer lived experience and knowledge upon which I can build? 
  • Do I allow myself to be held safely and nurtured by knowledge I don’t yet possess, when the source embodies this face of G-d?
  • Am I able to hold parenthood complexly, whether in this divine name, in my own parents, or in my own parenting, reaching for wisdom while also knowing my role in furthering and refining the role of parent?
  • I ask Avinu / Imeinu to comfort and guide me with a presence that demonstrates wisdom and encourages me to build upon it, creating my own trajectory toward earned elderhood.

Eli — אלי – My God

  • Have I identified and reached for the face of G-d most readily in my line of vision? Have I done the same in seeking solutions, connections, and support?
  • Do I reach for accessible presence, whether from G-d or from others, investing myself in relationships that are divine by way of their availability and intentionality?
  • Do I remember to embody my own potential to be a source of divine presence in the lives of those in my immediate vicinity?
  • I ask Eli to help me and guide me and challenge me from up close, and direct me in balancing my level of seeking so that I am never turning away from support or responsibility that is already right in my backyard.

Elohei Avoteinu — אֱלֹהֵי אֲבֹותֵינוּ –God of Our Ancestors

  • Have I grappled with what has been handed to me by way of prior generations, both in my own lineage and the long history of the Jewish people?
  • Am I living a life toward being an Ancestor, someone who has lived and died well, who has grappled their history and endeavoured to build upon it intentionally?
  • How do I wrestle in that sacred Jewish way to reconcile the Judaism of my ancestors with the Judaism I am living forward? How do I also wrestle with these layers of my personal lineage beyond Judaism?
  • I ask Elohei Avoteinu to hold, challenge, and enlighten me within the long lineage I carry within me, so that I may embody the best of my ancestors and heal/repair what they did not.

Shekhinah — שְׁכִינָה –The In-Dwelling Presence

  • Have I carried well the part of divinity that makes a home within me? Have I done my best to earn the trust of my most sacred inner cohabitant through my actions in the world, toward myself, and toward others?
  • Do I show up in the world carrying the responsibility of inner sovereignty while also deeply respecting and protecting the sovereignty of others?
  • How often do I remember that the sacred progress I wish to see in the world often starts with me and my embodiment of that potential?
  • I ask Shekhinah to nurture my sense of what is divine within myself, so that I show up in the world with the energy of that sacred presence fueling my best actions for myself and the world.

El Nora (Nora’ah) – אֵל נוֹרָא – The Great One/ The One Who Inspires Awe

  • Have I taken time to truly marvel at the world, at people, at nature, and at my part of the whole? Do I allow and even prioritize this kind of amazement as a way of balancing what is disappointing, painful, or enraging?
  • Do I take time to intentionally reach for the face of G-d that reminds me of the scale of it all, that places me in view of the true proportion of all things and my place among them?
  • I ask El Nora to astonish me with a sacred vantage point that can help me to feel less alone, less solely responsible, more possessing of a balanced ego and awe-inspiring sense of my role in the world.

Ehyeh Asher Ehyeh — אֶהְיֶה אֲשֶׁר אֶהְיֶה‎ – I Will Be What I Will Be / Sacred Emergence

  • Have I been willing to blossom in the right time, and without struggling against my natural growth cycle? Have I also allowed this of others?
  • Do I recognize and celebrate when I have unearthed something new in myself? Do I show up and integrate those system upgrades in myself and in those I love?
  • Will I use exactly who I am, in the divine image of this name of G-d, to show up in the world with the responsibility of a fully formed divine creation, refusing to wait until some unknown point of unattained change?
  • I ask Ehyeh Asher Eyheh to help me in being exactly where I am and exactly who I am, in recognizing which petals or leaves are ready to unfurl and which are growing without any need to strain toward that a premature blossoming.

Reminder of other places that I’ve found Elul offerings/spaces, if you’re still looking:

IAlso, these are places toward which I’m aiming my daily funds so far:

  • The Sameer Project – Donation-based iniative for Gaza led by Palestinians
  • Operation Olive Branch – Donations to a different GoFundMe for each day
  • eSIMs for Gaza – At each week mark, I’m checking the balance on eSIMs I’ve already donated to top them off, and purchasing a new one. (I use Nomad and my referral code YAAK32CY will save us each 25% on purchase of a future eSIM.)

Offered as a launching point for another week: The name chosen by Leia for Elul 15 is Moreinu, or Our Teacher, followed by HaMakom, or The Place, and Kol Dimama, or Still Small Voice.

Wishing you a meaningful week 3,
Yaakov

Originally posted on the newsletter.